The cover of Bella Magazine: “Claire’s Weight Misery – Two stone heavier after time abroad”, right next to an advert for a £4.99 ‘wonder serum’ and underneath “Fat Blast Diet – Lose 20lb this month”. A masterclass in how to make women feel inadequate and then try to sell them something to fix it.
Shame on @bellamagazineUK for publishing this, and hurrah for @clairesweeney for calling them out on it, particularly as it comes during #MentalHealthAwarenessWeek. #BoycottTrashMags
Why do editors continue to peddle this crap? Such lazy and vindictive journalism; find an unflattering picture of someone and then write some nonsense piece to go with it about how their life must be falling apart, usually with no factual basis whatsoever. Surely this wasn’t why they chose a career in journalism?!
The trouble is, we all know why magazines and newspapers do this; celeb character/image assassination sells. Daily Fail’s sidebar of shame is testimony to that; people love to gawp and revel in the misfortunes of others. But why?
What is it about our society that loves to build people up and then knock them down again? How is it OK that a celeb can be the darling of a publication one week and their metaphorical punching bag the next? Why is this form of public bullying still acceptable, when it’s the publishing equivalent of throwing rotten veg at someone shackled in the stocks?
As a person who hasn’t bought a magazine in at least a decade, this both fascinates and concerns me. Is my lack of attention to these magazines one of the reasons why I am happy in my own skin, perhaps (and why I spend very little on expensive skin and make up products, ha ha)?! Surely this spiral of judgement and derision isn’t helpful for anyone’s self esteem?
Here are my top tips for banning the negativity, and hopefully feeling lots happier about yourself as a result!
- Don’t allow trash publications in your house. Don’t buy them, don’t feed the monster. It’s bringing us all down.
- Recycle any that are in your house. If you’re keeping it because you find an element useful, take a snapshot, file it in a virtual folder and get rid. In future, source whatever it was elsewhere; you can get tons of recipes online and even see others’ reviews before going to the effort. If it’s makeup tips you’re after, maybe watch some YouTube make up tutorial channels. If it’s fashion you’re interested in, there are plenty of fashion blogs you could subscribe to, you can probably even choose one which more closely fits your kind of style than the generic offerings you get in magazines. If it’s the puzzles you like, there are numerous free apps. The only thing you actually have to give up is the celebrity gossip – and think of that as negativity decluttering!
- Don’t even read them while waiting at the doctors/dentists/hairdressers. The articles in these magazines, whether praising someone’s appearance, or criticising someone else’s, just feed into the idea that appearance is worthy of judgement. It isn’t. If they/you feel good that’s all that matters. Read a novel/non-fiction magazine/do sudoku to fill the time instead!
- Check your impulses to criticise others, even if you were only doing so mentally. It takes a while (particularly if you have grown up amongst relatives who like nothing more than to gossip and criticise!) to retrain your brain not to look for imperfections, but when you start to notice all the instances you would have said or thought something critical, you realise how much you were focusing on and feeding negativity. You can change this habit, and it gets easier as you keep doing it!
- Feel free to notice and compliment other people’s appearances instead! Everyone feels great when someone gives them a genuine compliment, especially if it’s a stranger so there’s no suspicion of an agenda – if you think someone’s hair/shoes/clothes are great – tell them! It’ll make their day, and will give you a warm fuzzy feeling too.
- When people compliment you, don’t brush it off. It’s tempting to negate nice things people say about us, sometimes because we feel it’s endearing to be self-deprecating, sometimes because we’re uncomfortable hearing nice things said about us. But that person took the time to say something nice; own the compliment, say thank you, and smile!
- Compliment your children on more than just their appearance. It’s nice to think our daughters are pretty and our sons handsome, but what about looking at other personality traits, like commenting on kindness, bravery, innovation, and perseverance?
- If you have children, talk to them about advertising, airbrushing, and unrealistic beauty standards, and how the advertisers who pay for the publications need you to feel insecure so they can sell you products to make you feel better about yourself.
- Be fabulous in your own skin!
In response to this Bella cover, Twitter is now awash with people sharing pictures of Claire Sweeney looking svelte and glamorous at events she’s attended over just the last couple of days. She clearly hasn’t gained 2 stone recently at all.
Ironically their meanness has led to lots of positive publicity. But even if she had gained weight, why would that be evidence she is miserable?
Again, kudos to Claire – she hasn’t posted any pictures of herself to prove lack of weight gain and refute the magazine’s claims – that’s no-one’s business, and would just perpetuate the myth that fat = unhappy. She just replied with the hashtag #nomisery. Respect.
It’s time to #boycotttrashmags.